giggles & grind

Money has never been my compass, but more like the gas in the car of life.

Yes, I need a paycheck to cover utilities, food, clothing, a roof over my head, and an occasional treat, but I learned at a very young age that money and happiness are not the same currency. I’ve been broke and at peace, and I’ve had more than enough money but felt completely off. This taught me quickly what actually matters.

In my late 20s, early 30s, I spent years worked two job, and then three, to help me build and sustain a lifestyle I wanted for my children and self. It was not glamorous, and it had many challenges, but I relied on nobody, and I know it showed (at least one of the two) my daughters that you can have everything you need, plus some, if you’re willing to put in the work. It was honest, and it shaped me.

Now, I’ve carved out a career where I don’t have to run myself into the ground just to sustain that same lifestyle, but it didn’t happen overnight. I showed up, I worked hard, and I became an asset to my employer.

When it comes to relationships, I don’t need someone to fund my life, and I need someone who can stand on their own two feet. If we build a life together, we carry it together That means supporting each other through everything, including financial seasons. I can be the bread-winner, or I can be the supplemental income provider, there’s no superiority between the two in my eyes. Life happens, and love isn’t suppose to clock out when financial situtations change.

It’s funny to say this, but I love watching rich people on reality TV. Mansions, luxury cars, closets as big as my apartment, trips all over the world. It’s entertainment to me, but it also serves as a reminder to me of something very important; you can have everything on the outside and still feel empty enough to stir up drama and be useless to society. I’ll take my “figure it out, make it work, and laugh through the chaos” life any day over being bored in a marble kitchen picking fights for fun.

Not having much money at different points in my life didn’t break me, it built me. I learned how to do things for myself that most people would have to pay for. I learned how to be resourceful. The kind of skills you don’t get when you just swipe a care can call someone to handle it. There’s a quiet confidence that comes from knowing, “I got this,” no matter what your bank account looks like.

I’m all for help when I truly need it. Well, that’s a lie. I’m born from parents that didn’t help. One I took care of financially, until I finally learned it wasn’t helping her but hurting me, and the other basically said “you’re on your own” the moment his children left the nest. I felt bad for myself when I was a young adult, but now I find it to be one of the greatest gifts they gave me. An unwrapped gift of course, because they wouldn’t spend anything extra on wrapping paper. And now I struggle watching people settle into doing the bare minimum while expecting maximum comfort. The math isn’t mathing for me. If you want more, you’ve got to move like you want more. Hustle doesn’t always mean burnout, it means effort, consistence, and a little bit of grit when things aren’t easy.

At the end of the day, I don’t make decisions based on how much extra money I could have, I make them based on what’s healthiest and best for me and my family. Wealth, to me, looks like peace of mind, stability, and knowing we build this life ourselves.

Money supports life, but it shouldn’t define it.